martes, 24 de marzo de 2009

"Yo, señor, no soy malo, aunque no me faltarían motivos para serlo"


Vale, sí... lo confesaré. Me hace algo de ilu irme de viaje. Porque me gusta viajar, porque jamás me he montado en barco, porque echo de menos ir en avión, me encanta estar horas y horas en el autobús, no me importa lo más mínimo. Así tengo tiempo para pensar, para sentirme más independiente y prepararme psicológicamente. Ya que sé que ese va a ser lo más difícil: una semana entera sin poder hablar con mi novio, ni verlo siquiera, no sé cómo lo llevaré. Además, rodeado de parejas, y más solo que la una. A ver si conozco a algún chico guapo.... nah, nah, que a mi los idiomas me gustan, pero de griego ni idea, ni falta que hace. Yo soy casto y puro, o si no me compraré un cinturón de castidad de esos tan rígidos, aunque no me harán falta. La verdad es que yo no soy fiel a mi novio... soy fiel a mí mismo, que he visto que no tengo necesidad de engañarlo con nadie. ¡Total, como si se me presentasen ocasiones, vaya, que ni una!
Hoy he hecho el examen de Lengua y de Matemáticas. El primero, que era sobre Pascual Duarte, me ha salido medianamente bien, ya que no estaba demasiado inspirado como para explayarme a gusto. Recomiendo fervorosamente el libro, a mí me ha encantado, tengo pensado leer (algún día de éstos, quizás cuando me jubile, ya que ahora no tengo tiempo para coger un libro, prefiero hablar por teléfono) alguno más de Cela, pues he descubierto a un gran escritor. Os dejo un fragmento que me encantó:


"La idea de la muerte llega siempre con paso de lobo, con andares de culebra, como todas las peores imaginaciones. Nunca de repente llegan las ideas que nos trastornan lo repentino ahoga unos momentos, pero nos deja, al marchar, largos años de vida por delante. Los pensamientos que nos enloquecen con la peor de las locuras, la de la tristeza, siempre llegan poco a poco y como sin sentir, como sin sentir invade la niebla los campos, o la tisis los pechos. Avanza, fatal, incansable, pero lenta, despaciosa, regular como el pulso. Hoy no la notamos; a lo mejor mañana tampoco, ni pasado mañana, ni en un mes entero. Pero pasa ese mes y empezamos a sentir amarga la comida, como doloroso el recordar; ya estamos picados. Al correr de los días y las noches nos vamos volviendo huraños, solitarios; en nuestra cabeza se cuecen las ideas, las ideas que han de ocasionar el que nos corten la cabeza donde se cocieron, quién sabe si para que no siga trabajando tan atrozmente. Pasamos a lo mejor hasta semanas enteras sin variar; los que nos rodean se acostumbraron ya a nuestra adustez y ya ni extrañan siquiera nuestro extraño ser. Pero un día el mal crece, como los árboles, y engorda, y ya no saludamos a la gente; y vuelven a sentirnos como raros y como enamorados. Vamos enflaqueciendo, enflaqueciendo, y nuestra barba hirsuta es cada vez más lacia. Empezamos a sentir el odio que nos mata; ya no aguantamos el mirar; nos duele la conciencia, pero, ¡no importa!, ¡más vale que duela!Nos escuecen los ojos, que se llenan de un agua venenosa cuando mirarnos fuerte. El enemigo nota nuestro anhelo, pero está confiado; el instinto no miente. La desgracia es alegre, acogedora, y el más tierno sentir gozamos en hacerlo arrastrar sobre la plaza inmensa de vidrios que va siendo ya nuestra alma. Cuando huimos como las corzas, cuando el oído sobresalta nuestros sueños, estamos ya minados por el mal; ya no hay solución, ya no hay arreglo posible. Empezamos a caer, vertiginosamente ya, para no volvernos a levantar en vida. Quizás para levantarnos un poco a última hora, antes de caer de cabeza hasta el infierno... Mala cosa."

-----

También a última hora hemos tenido el temido examen de Matemáticas que, quizás por la visita de Lírika en el recreo, me ha salido muy bien, estaba totalmente inspirado. Aunque, claro está, habrá que esperar a que nos dé el resultado. Después de salir del examen, sobre las 3 y media, me fui a casa de la antes citada, para despedirme del novio de Luca, ya que se vuelve a su Barcelona. Hemos pasado unos buenos momentos juntos, jugando y peleándonos en la cama de Lírika, ha sido muy divertido. Me he sentido muy bien entre ellos, lo necesitaba. Por eso le digo a eGeo que si quiere quede con Paul (por supuesto, con tres cinturones de castidad cada uno), que lo haga, pues le vendrá bien. Es nuestra falta, el cariño. Por ello a veces estamos irritantes, porque no soportamos más, nos sentimos solos. Ya sé que Paul no le acariciará ni le abrazará como yo, como tampoco nadie aquí puede hacer lo que hacía él, pero sin duda es de agradecer, pues no te ves solo y consigues recordar con más detalle cómo te hacía sentir el otro.

En fin, espero que os haya gustado el texto, es del final del libro, aunque lo he cortado para no desvelarle el final al que lo quiera leer :P . Ahora toca atacar a la literatura una vez más (vanguardismos, novecentistas, Juan Ramón Jiménez, generación del 27, etc, más las subordinadas y unas cuantas cosas más que son muy muy feas), y por último filosofía. Entonces sí, estaré libre, y escribiré a mis anchas... hasta que me vaya de crucero. ¡Si es que no paro!

¡¡Un beso enorme a todos!!


PD: el título, como no, es del libro, las primeras palabras de la biografía de Pascual Duarte.

33 comentarios:

Tristán dijo...

Hola Gato,

Me gustan todas las novelas de Cela, pero LA FAMILIA DE PASCUAL DUARTE, no, ya que Pascual Duarte mata a su perro.

Dicho esto, el cinturón de castidad se lleva en la cabeza y no en la (....).

A mi amito le costó mucho tiempo aprender a llevar el cinturón de castidad, pero una vez que aprendió ya no se lo quita.

Pienso que te lo vas a pasar de puta madre en el crucero y que vas a conocer a gente. No vas a estar solo. A lo mejor hasta ligas. Si eso, como tienes novio, pues siguele el rollo duarante todo el viaje y hazte el estrecho y cuando te proponga pasar a mayores, pues le dices " tengo novio y es una pena porque eres superguapo y superbritánico y y supertodo ". ( Si no es inglés, cambia lo de superbritánico por superitaliano o superdedondesas )

Asi quedas bien con el chico y contigo mismo y te lo pasas bien.

Espero que se haya resuelto ya el tema de los camarotes, aunque como te dije, no vas a utilizarlos mas que para ducharte y cambiarte.

Un lametón.

P.D. He puesto (....) para no poner polla.

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Disfruta del crucero que mucho te lo mereces!!!
Y sigue como siempre, con el objetivo claro en busca de la felicidad en Granada!!!

Peace-for-ever dijo...

No sé, creo que cuando uno está muy enamorado no tiene que esforzarse mucho para ser file, ya sale solo, cuando el enamoramiento va bajando la cosa cambia...

Un abrazo,

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